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Thursday, September 30, 2004
Post-Debate Reactions Wow. I just saw an American President beaten like a rented mule. Kerry clearly walked away with this one, by every standard. Based on verbal performance, Kerry was clear, articulate and solid. Bush stammered and hesitated through his answers. The body language was even more one-sided. Kerry's experience as a prosecutor showed in his poise and confidence, while Bush shifted about nervously like a middle school student trying to fake his way through a book report. If Bush was hoping to start the debates with his strongest card, he made a big miscalculation. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 9:46:00 PM   | This Guy is My New Hero For those of us that are trapped in Cubicle Hell, our paychecks holding us by the short hairs to a job that, in better times we'd quit in a minute knowing there was something better out there, this story is an inspiration. A sick, twisted inspiration, but an inspiration nonetheless. Ladies and gentlemen, I present The Story Of The Mad Shitter: A small sample to get your interest: The first signs that we had a superhero in our midst happened sometime in 1989, when one of the supervisors went to the supply mezzanine to collect some three-ring binders. To explain, I was working in the Non-Metallics Shop, a little area at the TI facility on Trinity Mills Road in Carrollton that was dedicated to making the nose cones for the Hostile Anti-Radar Missile (HARM for short) that TI was foisting upon the Navy. The company was doing well at that time, but very little of that wealth was trickling down to the people on the bottom, and we were definitely the people on the bottom. The Non-Metallics Shop ran three shifts for at least five to six days a week, and I was on the Second Shift: 3 p.m. to 11:15. Most of management only operated during daylight hours, and our supervisor at the time was usually in the parking lot with his girlfriend in the back seat of his pimp-red Camaro shortly after dark, so the environment wasn’t quite as foul as it was during the day. This time, though, the girlfriend was out of town, so The Man was actually accomplishing a bit of work when he went up to the second level of this gigantic shop space to get those binders. He got his binders, but he also found a gigantic human turd on the mezzanine, placed so that the first thing anyone saw as they came up the staircase was a nice brown replica of the Hindenberg. He screamed and ran back down, demanding an accounting of all of Second Shift, and waited for someone to confess to this atrocity. While I'm not inspired to indulge in any copycat vigilante acts, I do salute the Mad Shitter for his... unique... donation to the struggle of the workers against the morons that call themselves "management". EDIT: Fixed the busted link. My bad. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 3:44:00 PM | Debate Tonight If the Gods cared about us, they'd let the mask slip off George's face tonight so everyone can see the idiot as he truly is. I'm a believer, though, that the Gods don't do stuff like that, because it would actually help us. In the interest, then, of making the debate more entertaining, I've ganked from another online forum some rules that will keep you watching, listening and drunk as all get out. Shout out to my fellow Queer Geeks - you know who you am! Take one drink if: A candidate mentions an ordinary American by name A candidate mentions Bill Clinton A candidate mentions John Ashcroft A candidate mentions John McCain A candidate mentions Enron A candidate mentions Halliburton A candidate mentions a member of his or her family A candidate gives out his or her campaign Web site URL A candidate flourishes a printout of a strategy paper or a bill he or she co-sponsored A candidate looks into the wrong camera during introductions A candidate speaks Spanish A candidate refuses to answer a hypothetical question A candidate evades the question of whether they'd vote for Bush's $87 billion A candidate uses the phrase "when I'm president" A candidate promises to "support our troops" A candidate says the first name of the moderator when speaking to them A candidate says a damn thing about a nation OTHER than Iraq, Iran or Afganistan A candidate tries to be funny >>take one swallow if Bush: says Iraq says terrorists or terrorism says evildoers butchers a simple term like better = betterest, abu ghraib = abu gahareebeeya ahem says patriot mentions Allawi brings up Kerry's vote against the "Defense of Marriage Act" dodges a question about his National Guard service >>take two swallows if Bush: says anything about his children, your children or grandchildren cites an average american by name mentions France claims a great number of countries joined the coalition to fight the war in Iraq calls John Kerry the most liberal senator in Washington >>kamikaze! drain your glass if Bush: mentions Michael Moore looks at his watch refuses to answer a question and turns to the moderator for an out because he helped write the rules and knows he can squirm out of the tough questions >>take one swallow if Kerry: says Vietnam says veterans says Iraq mentions Bin Laden states he is in favor of "traditional marriage" >> take two swallows if Kerry: mentions medals denounces Bush for not saying the Swift Boat team was full of shit. states that Saddam Hussein had nothing to do with September 11th and that Bush knows it >>kamikaze! drain your glass if Kerry: daintily sips his Perrier with pinky lifted accuses Bush of being a liar >>Take Friday off if: the candidates get into a fist fight CHUG YOUR BEER if any candidate does any of the following: Says something pro-queer; Says something intelligent about the Muslim religion; Talks about family planning scientifically; Talks about Palestinians without being condenscending or ridiculous posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 10:40:00 AM | Bwah! This is why politicians need to pay attention to their domain registries. Colorado Congresswoman Marilyn Musgrave's old campaign Web site has been taken over by pornographers. Seems Ms. Musgrave, she of " Hats off to the porn merchants - Free Trade in action! posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 9:57:00 AM | Wednesday, September 29, 2004
Had to Get This Off My Chest To the ignorant yokel dumbass bitch in the smoking area: Yes, as a matter of fact, I am one of those America-hating libruls. I'm queer, I'm going to vote for Kerry, and I think the current occupant of the White House is a psychopathic, inarticulate moron that would be better served with a life-without-parole sentence in Huntsville, TX for all the terrible things he's done to America and the rest of the world. Additionally, your suggestion that we "depart [sic] all them Ay-rabs" is one of the least-informed, idiotic, rock-bottom, septic-tank-dreg stupid ideas I've ever heard. You may never realize how close you came to breaking my tenuous self-control and getting your trailer-park-trash face smashed repeatedly against the concrete, and that's probably a good thing. Your willingness to worship at the feet of the worst president this nation has ever seen, bar none, combined with your complete ignorance of anything resembling a fact and your apparent inability to generate an opinion on your own, shows you to be a prime example of what's wrong with this nation, and I can only hope that you have had the decency to have yourself sterilized, as the thought of someone as mind-bogglingly stupid as you reproducing quite frankly makes me want to cry for the state of the gene pool. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 3:37:00 PM | Ganking a Meme from Dan Thanks to Dan Among Den for providing a few more minutes of amusement. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 10:05:00 AM | The Damn Animals are Getting Uppity Again It's not monkeys this time (and, for the record, I still stand ready to welcome our Ape Overlords with open arms). From Merrie Olde England, we have this: A giant spider shut down a school yesterday. The speckled brown exotic creature — as big as a man’s palm — crawled from a set of drums brought in from Senegal for a music workshop. Me, I'm no fan of spiders, especially the ones "as big as a man's palm". I'm not ashamed to admit that, were I to be confronted with a spider that size, my reaction would be similar to that of Jerry Clower at his first visit to a snake-handling church: "This place got a back door? No? Where you reckon they want one?" And in the former Soviet Union, we've got this: Giant rats on the move in Kyrgyzstan According to scientists, Kyrgyzstan is infested with a new breed of large, resilient rat, descendants of rattus norvegicus - albino rats, which were used in laboratory experiments during Soviet times. Some escaped and bred with the local variety, creating the current, bold, adaptable breed that is proving hard to control. The rats are able to produce offspring after just three months, producing litters of around 10 young. To make matters worse, the rats appear to be resistant to rat poison: The pests have proved immune to traditional poison, with some scientists noting that the rats actually thrive on it. ::gibbers:: I'm not a fan of rats, either. Gaaaaaaah. Rats the size of cats, spiders the size of rats... fuck all that noise. Makes you long for the simple joy of a monkey knife fight, it does. 
posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 9:16:00 AM | Tuesday, September 28, 2004
Who's Osama Supporting in 2004? Short answer: Nobody, as he's not a US Citizen and is thus ineligible to cast a ballot. Still, if you listen to the crap spewing from the terminal syphilis cases in the GOP, you'd think Osama was doing everything short of appearing on stage next to John Kerry. Sen. Orrin Hatch, Sept. 21: Terrorists "are going to throw everything they can between now and the election to try and elect Kerry." House Speaker Dennis Hastert, Sept. 18: "I don't have data or intelligence to tell me one thing or another, [but] I would think they would be more apt to go [for] somebody who would file a lawsuit with the World Court or something rather than respond with troops," Hastert said. Asked by a reporter whether he thought al-Qaida would operate more comfortably with John Kerry in the White House, Hastert replied, "That's my opinion, yes." Vice President Dick Cheney, Sept. 7: "It's absolutely essential that on Nov. 2, we make the right choice, because if we make the wrong choice, then the danger is that we’ll get hit again, that we’ll be hit in a way that will be devastating from the standpoint of the United States," Cheney remarked, also suggesting that with Kerry as president the U.S. would not respond vigorously to a future attack. Ann Coulter, Sept. 7:"I think it's unquestionable that Republicans are more likely to prevent the next attack."... "However, I will grant that John Kerry will improve the economy in the emergency services and body bag industry." George Bush might not want his buddies to throw stones in his house of glass, though. Ever since the bungling of the assault on Tora Bora, in which Bin Laden and other top Al Quaeda officials made a clean getaway, attempts to link Kerry and Osama are about the only times his administration has mentioned him. And, of course, we have the pResident's own words to indict him on his utter lack of concern for Bin Laden's wherabouts: 3/13/2002 - White House Press Conference As opposed to his tough talk in 2001, when he said: 10/11/2001 Kerry's career has plenty of evidence of his ability and willingness to shut down terror groups - his work to shut down the Bank of Commerce and Credit International (BCCI) was accomplished despite the interference of the Bush I administration and leadership within his own party. While George W. Bush was getting loans from BCCI (a money-laundering operation for drug lords and terror groups) and Poppy Bush was trying to squelch investigations into the bank's shady dealings, John Kerry pushed and fought to shut the bank down. While George W. Bush couldn't manage to make it in to drills in the Texas Air National Guard's "Champagne Squadron", John Kerry was seeing firsthand what was happening in Vietnam, bravely serving and protecting the men in his command despite his misgivings about the war itself. While George W. Bush was running business after business into the ground, John Kerry was serving as a prosecuting attorney and as a Senator for the State of Massachusetts. Personally, I think Osama bin Laden's gonna hate the US no matter who gets elected. Attempts to smear Kerry by associating his name with Osama's are sleazy politics at their worst. Which, come to think of it, is how the Bush Crime Family operates. (Willie Horton, anyone?) posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 10:40:00 AM | Monday, September 27, 2004
Still Short On Sleep, But Better Got about 6 hours of sleep today, and I'm feeling almost human again. Made my bi-weekly run to Dragon's Lair to pick up my comic subscriptions, and among them was the first issue of a new limited series, Elric: The Making of a Sorcerer, written by Moorcock and drawn by Walt Simonson (perhaps best known for his excellent run on "The Mighty Thor"). 
It's original, a look at Elric before he became Emperor of Melnibonè, and the story is compelling, showing that Moorcock has lost none of his gift for inventive and engrossing storytelling. Still, I find myself wishing that P. Craig Russell had been available to do the art for this series. I remember back in the 1980s, Russell had teamed up with Roy Thomas on some Elirc titles, and I've always associated Elric with Russell's flowing, rich style. Walt Simonson has a more blocky style, similar to that of Jack Kirby (another favorite of mine), but his Melnibonè just doesn't have the decadent, organic feel that Russell's did. The story has me hooked, and I'll be sticking with it, but I can't help but think that I'd like it even better with Russell instead of Simonson. Simonson, I think, would have worked best on "Hawkmoon" or "Corum". posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 10:41:00 PM | Sunday, September 26, 2004
Feh Back in the office for another shift. Various events today combined to prevent me from getting any sleep, so I'm back here at work to send out another round of warnings to the field techs in the path of the hurricane that there's a hurricane passing over them. Later tonight, a brief review of the Michael Moorcock/Walt Simonson Elric comic. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 11:28:00 PM | Saturday, September 25, 2004
Sam Adams Has Something to Say Some quotes for the die-hard Bush supporters out there: If ye love wealth better than liberty, the tranquility of servitude better than the animating contest of freedom, go home from us in peace. We ask not your counsels or your arms. Crouch down and lick the hands which feed you. May your chains set lightly upon you, and may posterity forget that you were our countrymen. The liberties of our country, the freedom of our civil Constitution, are worth defending at all hazards; and it is our duty to defend them against all attacks. We have received them as a fair inheritance from our worthy ancestors: they purchased them for us with toil and danger and expense of treasure and blood, and transmitted them to us with care and diligence. It will bring an everlasting mark of infamy on the present generation, enlightened as it is, if we should suffer them to be wrested from us by violence without a struggle, or to be cheated out of them by the artifices of false and designing men. This post brought to you by caffeine, insomnia, mandatory overtime and the letter "A". posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 10:38:00 PM | Long Weekend, Short Rest Insomnia last night, followed by the children's usual pre-dawn "wake up and make a whole goddamn lot of noise". Tonight, and probably Sunday night, I'll be working from 11PM - 7AM because of the goddamn hurricane. My duties will consist of sending an email out every hour to our technicians in Flordia advising them that there is a hurricane in the area, and that some of our sites will have lost electric power as a result. For this, I get no weekend and no sleep. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 3:39:00 PM | Friday, September 24, 2004
Motherfuckers Ain't Gettin' My Business Again Wal-Mart Agrees Not to Sell Anti-Semitic Tract By Arthur Spiegelman Here's the thing that gets me - they sold it with the following disclaimer: "If ... The Protocols are genuine (which can never be proven conclusively), it might cause some of us to keep a wary eye on world affairs. We neither support nor deny its message. We simply make it available for those who wish a copy." If they're genuine? Stupid motherfuckers. I hope they burn. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 3:38:00 PM | This Can't Be For Real Scratch that - I'm willing to bet that, even if it's not for real, there's someone out there looking at it and thinking, "Wow! I need that, so I can sleep in safety! What am I talking about? This: The Quantum Sleeper 
From the website:
It is also touted as security against kidnappers and stalkers. The photo is kind of amusing - the couple looks like they really want a caption that says, "Thanks, Quantum Sleeper! You saved our marriage!" posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 10:02:00 AM | Friday Five - Slogging Through the Time-Space Continuum! Gord asks: My question for this week turns to Time Travel again, but this time, it's a Connie Willis sort. In her novels, characters often return to some time period in the past in order to do research; time travelers are very often historians, and archeologists have been rendered all but obsolete. If you were able to propose five such trips, assuming that one would work and that you would have to go and actually live in that time period, researching it and studying it for up to a few years at a time, where would you go? Assume that you have to study the local language of the time, and that an implant will be provided to aid you with this study (though it won't do the whole job for you); assume costuming will be provided, but imperfectly. Assume that you face all the risks and dangers anyone else who looked identical to you might (such as enslavement, sexual assault, and worse); you may assume only a few well-planned inoculations against the obvious (such as plague antibodies for a Medieval historian) and a little basic defense training. Where and when would you be willing to spend a few years just being present, observing and studying how people live? The framing of the question precludes setting myself up as a God of Technology and proclaiming myself king - were you thinking of me specifically, Gord? Putting that aside, then, there's a few periods that interest me. With a few exceptions, they're all either poorly-known or little-researched, and I'd be most interested in learning the stuff we don't know. Narrowing it down to 5 periods, the list would look something like this: (1) Tartessos - A lost city, somewhere on the southern coast of the Iberian Peninsula. Nothing is known of its culture or language, but it appears (based upon very limited historical accounts) to have been a city of merchants and seafarers. It would be relatively easy, I think, to pose as a merchant from far away, learn the language and perhaps even find some way of marking the location of the city for future archaeological excavation. The Tartessians definitely made it to the British Isles and possibly to the Azores and the Canaries. (2) Elizabethan England - How could I pass up a chance to hang out in London and catch a few of Shakespeare's plays live, performed by the original actors? Yeah, I'd probably try to hang out with Shakespeare and shoot the shit with him, and the temptation to talk him out of Timon of Athens would be strong, but I'd really enjoy that period. (3) The Black Sea, ca. 10-12000 BC - I'd want to make sure that the exact chronology of the inundation of the Black Sea was identified, but it would be fascinating to see what culture had developed there before the Mediterranean broke through the Bosporus and the shores of the former freshwater lake were sunken beneath 300+ feet of water. If I could get the exact time right, I'd find a spot and film the floodwaters breaking through. (4) Cahokia - A vast mound-builder complex in what is now southern Illinois, I'd be interested in seeing what the culture was like and what happened to it. Some degree of disguise would be necessary, I think - at the very least, a good tan and hair dye. Like the Maya, the inhabitants of Cahokia appear to have abandoned their cities rather suddenly, in historical terms. (5) The Minoan Empire - I'd like to see this, as long as I can be sure I'm not, say, standing on Thera when the volcano decides to blow the fuck up. The Minoan culture is still poorly understood, and I'd like to have a chance to sail around and see how far they got, and why they fell. Honorable mention goes to: Great Zimbabwe, Roman Britain and Byzantium/Constantinople. If you don't know by now where to find the other Friday Fivers, I'm kind of wasting my breath telling you, aren't I? posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 7:57:00 AM | Thursday, September 23, 2004
Looks Like State Got Left Out of The Loop Again According to Dick Cheney, Al Quaeda's close association with Saddam Hussein was, along with his Weapons of Mass Destruction Related Planning Activity Wishlist, a primary reason for our invasion. Imagine my surprise when I see that, according to the State Department, there hasn't been any Al Quaeda activity in Iraq. 
Where has Al Queda been active? In 45 nations: Albania Algeria Afghanistan Azerbaijan Australia Austria Bahrain Bangladesh Belgium Bosnia Egypt Eritrea France Germany India Iran Ireland Italy Jordan Kenya Kosovo Lebanon Libya Malaysia Mauritania Netherlands Pakistan Philippines Qatar Russia Saudi Arabia Somalia South Africa Sudan Switzerland Tajikistan Tanzania Tunisia Turkey Uganda United Arab Emirates United Kingdom United States Uzbekistan Yemen I highlighted in bold nations that are at least nominal allies of the US. italic nations have WMD or WMD ambitions. Those nations in red have proven support at some level of the government for Al Quaeda. Do the math. Why are we wasting our time in Iraq? posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 9:07:00 AM | Wednesday, September 22, 2004
Grover Norquist to Greatest Generation: Go On and Die, You Anti-American Bastards Ganked this from Daily Kos: In an interview with the Spanish paper El Mundo, Norquist was asked if the Democratic Party was coming to an end. His reply? "Yes, because in addition their demographic base is shrinking. Each year, 2 million people who fought in the Second World War and lived through the Great Depression die. This generation has been an exeception in American history, because it has defended anti-American policies. They voted for the creation of the welfare state and obligatory military service. They are the base of the Democratic Party. And they are dying. And, at the same time, all the time more Americans have stocks. That makes them defend the interests of business, because it is their own interest. Because of that, it's impossible to bring to the fore policies of social hate, of class warfare." Yep. You read that right. Rosie the Riveter, the Tuskeegee Airmen, the Civilian Conservation Corps, the 101st Airborne's Band of Brothers - the men that fought their way across Europe and the Pacific, brave men and women that heeded the words of Franklin Roosevelt and worked, fought, bled and died to save the world from Fascism, the Nazis and Japanese Imperialists are ANTI-AMERICAN. The mind boggles. Go fuck yourself, Norquist. You show your face in Austin, I'll be glad to step outside with you and have a little discussion about what it means to be an American. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 1:29:00 PM | Keepin' Them Terrorists Off Our Airplanes In a bold move, Transportation Security Administration officials barred singer Yusuf Islam from entry to the United States. Islam, formerly known as Cat Stevens, is perhaps best known for his hit "Peace Train", containing such subversive, anti-American lyrics as Now I've been crying lately, thinking about the world as it is Why must we go on hating, why can't we live in bliss No reason was given for this, but we've come to expect that from the Bush misAdministration. Yusuf Islam joins such anti-American terrorists as Ted Kennedy, John Lewis and Tariq Ramadan on the list of people our government thinks are too dangerous to be allowed to fly. The list is unpublished - you won't know until you try to board a plane if you're on it or not - and once you're on it, there's no way to be removed. Does it make us safer? Not really. Like so many other "improvements" in security in recent years, it gives the illusion of safety without accountability or actual results. After 3 years of fighting terror, all we've got to show for it is a resurgent Taliban in Afghanistan, a still-free Osama bin Laden, a quagmire in Iraq that hemorrhages American and Iraqi casualties on a daily basis, near-universal distrust of our motives worldwide, a nuclear-armed North Korea, Iran enriching uranium, a festering Israeli/Palestinian conflict and a pretty-but-useless color-coded terror alert system that seems to change only when Bush slips in the polls. The "strong leadership" of the Simp Chimp has done nothing to make us safer, and too much to make the world more dangerous. John Kerry has the unenviable task of having to sort out the mess that the neo-clowns have made of America and the world, but he's willing to do it. Bush, meanwhile, prattles on about "compassionate conservatism", makes empty promises to America's working families and plans to escalate his "War on posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 9:31:00 AM | Tuesday, September 21, 2004
Thinking Of Yoooouuuuuu, Georgie-Boy! King Lear Act II, Scene II KENT Fellow, I know thee. OSWALD What dost thou know me for? KENT A knave; a rascal; an eater of broken meats; a base, proud, shallow, beggarly, three-suited, hundred-pound, filthy, worsted-stocking knave; a lily-livered, action-taking knave, a whoreson, glass-gazing, super-serviceable finical rogue; one-trunk-inheriting slave; one that wouldst be a bawd, in way of good service, and art nothing but the composition of a knave, beggar, coward, pandar, and the son and heir of a mongrel bitch: one whom I will beat into clamorous whining, if thou deniest the least syllable of thy addition. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 10:59:00 PM | Teacher Conference Met with Drew's teacher today. A good report - minor concerns about his focus, but she says he's always got the answers for problems in class, and is obviously reading at at least a 4th Grade level. We're obviously pleased as punch about that. While we were in the conference, his teacher (and anyone that complains around me about public schools or public school teachers gets a punch in the face) showed us a story he's writing. It's about his baby brother, and this passage stuck out in my mind: Alec likes to walk around. Last weekend, he tripped and cut his head. The good news is he didn't need stiches. The other good news is there is no bad news. He's got a scab on his face, and he looks like he has been in a bar fight.emphasis mine Little pitchers, big ears. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 4:50:00 PM | Cautious Hope IMDB reports that Kerry Conran, creator of Sky Captain & the World of Tomorrow, is currently slated to take over the helm of A Princess of Mars. I will continue to monitor the status of this film, and maintain guarded optimism for a decent result. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 10:59:00 AM | And I'm Not Ignoring Drew... I know I'm raising him right, too - the boy reads like nobody's business. Many's the time I've gone into his room late at night to turn off his study lamp and gently pull the book he was reading from under his face, careful not to wake him. Pirates and book-lovers - a parent could do much, much worse. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 9:24:00 AM | We Must Be Raising Them Right A little while ago, Melissa got a CD from a friend that contained, among other things, a song by the Canadian band Tanglefoot. It's a lovely little pirate tune called Traighli Bay, with a delightfully catchy chorus: And with tar on our pigtails and blood on our rapiers Franny and Alec absolutely love this song, and any family trip in the van includes at least 3 plays of this song, with Franny singing along at the top of her lungs and Alec clapping in time. At home, Alec will stand on the coffee table and bounce up and down, giggling at Franny's antics. It does a man proud, to see his children so happy over pirate music. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 8:59:00 AM | Monday, September 20, 2004
Support Our Troops! Re-enlist, or go to Iraq. That's the message enlisted personnel in the 3rd Brigade Combat Team were told at an assembly last week in Fort Carson, Colorado. "They said if you refuse to re-enlist with the 3rd Brigade, we'll send you down to the 3rd Armored Cavalry Regiment, which is going to Iraq for a year, and you can stay with them, or we'll send you to Korea, or to Fort Riley (in Kansas) where they're going to Iraq," said one of the soldiers, a sergeant. Combine that with evidence the Pentagon is absolutely, under no circumstances, planning either to reinstate the draft, raise the draft age to 34 OR draft women, and you've got a depressing picture for the undertrained, underpaid, overdeployed troops stuck in the quagmire in Iraq. In fact, this mistake of a war, started by a mistake of a president, is going to hurt us bad for decades to come, both in loss of prestige and combat readiness of our regular military and National Guard. North Korea is just as much a threat as ever, if not more, and we're pulling troops away from the DMZ so we can keep some kind of lid on Iraq. Our allies are unwilling to commit troops to the Iraqi meatgrinder, in large part due to the incompetence and arrogance of our military's civilian leadership. Thanks to the abuse of prisoners at Abu Ghraib, our brave soldiers face an enraged populace. The flip-flopping of our misAdministration in Fallujah and Najaf has done nothing but strengthen the Shiite and Sunni jihadis. You've heard of the Midas Touch, right? The morons in the White House have the opposite - everything they touch turns to shit. What does the Chimp-in-Chief have to say about the possiblity of a draft? And, no, we don't need a draft. What we need to do is -- don't worry about it. So don't worry about it! That seems to be the Bushistas' campaign strategery. Rising body count in Iraq got you down? Don't worry about it! We've already celebrated our victory! Crappy economy? Don't worry about it! Lots of folks make money on eBay! High insurance costs troubling you? Don't worry about it! We're gonna shift attention to those nasty "trial lawyers"! Mr. President, if you're worried about reelection, Don't worry about it! We've got someone more qualified ready to take over in January and start setting things right. Just let John Kerry go to work, and you can go back to your dude ranch in Crawford and drink yourself into oblivion. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 8:54:00 AM | Sunday, September 19, 2004
Arrrrrr! Ahoy, Mateys! I be Cap'n Black Sam Flint o' the Bloody Flux, an' I've Shanghied this blog fer me own nefarious purposes. Yer regular Cap'n has been... unavoidably detained fer the time bein', an' since it be International Talk Like A Pirate Day, I've decided to take the liberty of offerin' me own services as a correspondent. Cap'n Adam's crew has been a scurvy pack o' mutinous knaves today, makin' such a mess o' the decks that he's been forced to swab 'em time and time again, when he was hopin' to have the time to drink some grog an' maybe keelhaul a few lubbers like that whoreson Bush an' his First Mate. Arr. 'Tis a sad day, when a pirate must spend his time swabbin' instead o' enjoyin' some rum. Me own First Mate, Mr. Tommy "Bugger-All" Biggers, has suggested I share some o' the jokes what we love to hear on the Bloody Flux. Havin' a choice between lamentin' the sad lack of treasure-laden galleons and silk-filled Dutch brigs to plunder or engagin' in a wee mite o' levity, I have chosen the latter. Where do a pirate's buccaneers live? Under his buckin' hat! How much does it cost fer a pirate to get earrings? A buck an' ear. Why wasn't the cabin boy allowed to go see the new pirate movie? It were rated "Arrrrr". There be more jokes than that, but Bugger-All has reminded me that I be savin' 'em fer Open Mike Night in Tortuga next month. So I'll instead invite the lot o' ye to Salty Sam's Laff Stop in Tortuga on October 13th to enjoy the comedic stylin's o' Cap'n Black Sam Flint, or, as I'll be known on stage, "Cap'n Crackers, the Pirate Prop Comic". posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 5:42:00 PM | Saturday, September 18, 2004
Movie Review 
Saw Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow today. It's worth seeing for the art direction - especially if Modernist art and architecture in the mode of the classic pulps gets you all tingly in your Special Bits. It looks like Hugo Gernsback and Fritz Lang got together to make a movie, and as a fan of the pulps, I loved the way the movie looked - chock-full of iconic images and suffused with a washed, soft-focus look that made the all-CGI sets work. Jude Law and Gwyneth Paltrow look like they belong in this period, but their relationship lacked the "snap" needed to get the right period feel - something like William Powell and Myrna Loy's relationship, or the best of Carey Grant and Katherine Hepburne. Giovanni Ribisi and Angelina Jolie are welcome, but are on-screen for far too brief a time for my tastes. The plot is straight out of any of dozens of serials and radio dramas from the period, with a mad scientist (played by Sir Lawrence Olivier - yes, you read that right), an enigmatic black-clad assassin, giant robots and hidden Tibetan kingdoms. It's simple, and better lead actors could have made it easier to ignore the lightness of the script. All in all, though, it's worth watching, flaws and all. It's not a timeless classic, but it's a beautiful film and enjoyable just for that. Plus, Angelina Jolie in a tight uniform with an eyepatch just does things to me. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 5:40:00 PM | Oh, This Is Too Fucking Priceless! Goose3five at Comments From Left Field had this link up: Grover Norquist speaks! Q: What are the key, or most problematic, battleground states? posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 7:37:00 AM | Friday, September 17, 2004
Kerry Packs 'Em In 13,000 at a Kerry rally in Madison, WI. 
And these folks didn't have to sign a loyalty oath! posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 9:25:00 AM | Friday 5 - Our Animal Friends Dan asks us: What are the five happiest moments you've had with pets? A simple enough question, to be sure. (1) Around 1977 or so, a stray my brother and I adopted had a litter of puppies. Our father took us out in the middle of the night to see Poochie give birth, and it was pretty cool for us to see the tiny pups as their mother licked them clean and nudged them into the protective curl of her body. As the puppies grew older, we found homes for them - the last two, Freckles and Scooter, were adopted by a family that lived on a farm outside of town, as was Poochie. The moment of seeing her and her puppies launch themselves out of our station wagon into a huge yard and run around barking and chasing each other was magical - bittersweet, to be sure, but we were unable to deny that the dogs were happier there. (2) 1995, Austin. It was the year after Melissa's miscarriage, the year before Drew was born. We had moved into a new house, and decided to adopt a dog from the pound. We lucked out and found a chocolate lab/doberman mix and brought her home. The first night, Cordelia wailed for her littermates, so I spread a sleeping bag on the living room floor and slept there. Cordy curled up in my arms, seemingly satisfied to know that, if her siblings were lot to her, she had a new pack, one that would take care of her and keep her safe and warm. (3) 1991, Birmingham. Melissa and I went to the pound to look for a cat. As we walked up and down the rows of cages, one slim charcoal-colored cat caught my eye. He approached the bars and squeeked pitifully, so I opened the cage and he leapt into my arms. Nicholas has come to deeply resent every additional member of our family, but still loves to be held in my arms and nuzzle the underside of my chin. (4) 1982, Flint Hill. When my parents bought their farm, the previous owners included two horses as part of the deal. Johnny and Poncho were pretty calm horses, already kind of old but good for lazy rides around the farm. I learned how to saddle a horse, how to brush one down after a ride, and exactly how much more a horse will listen to your commands if he thinks there's a chance of a sugar cube or apple at the end of a ride. I like horses, me. If I had the land and the money, I'd have one now. (5) 1984, Flint Hill. I had two mice - one white, one black. Hastur and Ithaqua went to school with me one day, and great fun was had by all. You ever made a bully jump 4 feet into the air? It's simple to do - just slip a black mouse down your sleeve and shake the bully's hand as the mouse creeps out of your cuff. They spent most of the day in the pocket of my jacket, except during Chemistry, when I put them in a 1-gallon beaker on my desk and they went to town on some lettuce. Shortly thereafter, the rules on pets at school were changed from "No cats or dogs" to "No animals except seeing-eye dogs". The other Friday Fivers are listed to the left. Read and enjoy. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 7:47:00 AM | Thursday, September 16, 2004
Man, Iraq Makes Vietnam Look Like The Liberation Of Paris! Over 1000 American dead so far. Thousands more wounded. The purported WMD have yet to be found, if they ever existed. The much-ballyhooed Saddam-Al Quaeda connection doesn't exist, no matter how many times Dick Cheney insists it does. No accurate figures as to the number of dead Iraqis exist. Estimates range into the thousands, and there's no real way to know how many of those were actual insurgents and how many were "collateral damage". In the end, that distinction won't matter to most Iraqis. A dead relative is a dead relative, and if they can blame us, they will - which means more recruits and supporters for the insurgency. I'm not the only one thinking this, of course. Sidney Blumenthal has a disturbing piece in Salon that details the concerns of top-level military experts: The "war is lost" After the killing of four U.S. contractors in Fallujah, the U.S. Marines besieged the city for three weeks in April -- the watershed event for the insurgency. "I think the president ordered the attack on Fallujah," said Gen. Hoare. "I asked a three-star Marine general who gave the order to go to Fallujah and he wouldn't tell me. I came to the conclusion that the order came directly from the White House." Then, just as suddenly, the order was rescinded, and Islamist radicals gained control, using the city as a base, al-Qaida ("base" in Arabic) indeed. Bush's hard-on for Saddam, his lies, his poor leadership have all combined to put us in a place in which we cannot win, we can't lose and we can't get out of the game. No matter who wins in November, we're stuck in Iraq, losing more and more men and women and killing more and more Iraqis to end up achieving none of our goals save the removal of Saddam Hussein, but leaving the groundwork for a protracted civil war and, if the Iraqis are really unlucky, a subsequent reign of terror by some variety of fundamentalist or another. For America, nothing so dire as all that, but we've already seen the evaporation of the goodwill 9/11 had garnered us. Thanks to Abu Ghraib and the subsequent whitewashes of Administration involvement, we've lost the moral high ground. Our military is stretched thin, almost to the breaking point. We're pulling troops out of South Korea, where they help defend against an aggressive, terror-supporting, WMD-owning totalitarian state, to bolster Iraq. National guardsmen are being sent out poorly trained and poorly equipped, while their benefits are being slashed. Our government insists it has the right to ignore habeas corpus, to treat American citizens as enemy combatants and to imprison those who dare to speak out against the Maximum Leader at his carefully stage-managed potemkin rallies. Here's the least cheering bit of info from Blumenthal's article: Gen. Hoare believes from the information he has received that "a decision has been made" to attack Fallujah "after the first Tuesday in November. That's the cynical part of it -- after the election. The signs are all there." He compares any such planned attack with late Syrian dictator Hafez al-Assad's razing of the rebel city of Hama. "You could flatten it," said Hoare. "U.S. military forces would prevail, casualties would be high, there would be inconclusive results with respect to the bad guys, their leadership would escape, and civilians would be caught in the middle. I hate that phrase 'collateral damage.' And they talked about dancing in the street, a beacon for democracy." Mission accomplished, eh? posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 9:33:00 AM | Wednesday, September 15, 2004
Hey! It's A Local Scumbag To Hate! Found an article in the Austin-American Statesman that got me kind of pissed off. Pastor accused of defying church law on gays What pissed me off? This: A University of Texas student has asked Presbyterian Church officials to investigate an Austin pastor for conducting same-sex union ceremonies, a move that could lead to a church trial and the loss of the minister's job. So let's get this straight - a snot-nosed pissant that's not even a member of Rigsby's church got his panties in a twist because two men had the audacity to love each other, and Reverend Rigsby had the audacity to offer a blessing of their union. Rigsby, to his further credit, has already been accused of ordaining an openly gay elder in his chuch, St. Andrew's Presbyterian. But while Brown takes steps that could cost Rigby his church, Rigby has taken the unusual approach of advising his accuser, supplying the student with details about other same-sex union blessings he's performed. So good luck to you, Reverend Rigsby - as the son of a minister that took his share of lumps from the Methodists for his commitment to the Civil Rights Movement, I salute your courage, your vision and your faith. Robert Brown, I condemn you. You're a pustule, a turd, a boil on the ass of society. Here's hoping you develop some moral clarity before much more time passes. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 7:19:00 PM | New Domestic Disturbance Melissa's latest column is out - The Renaissance Cometh. Go read it. I've also been remiss in announcing the latest from Adrienne, so here's a belated link: Shaken and Stirred posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 10:31:00 AM | Whacknoodles Of The Week Been a while since I've done this - not for a lack of Certified, Grade-A Whacknoodles, though. Just... slipped my miiinnnnd. This week, we look at Pure Life Ministries. Their mission is, and I quote: Pure Life Ministries exists to serve Christian individuals and organizations dealing with sexual sin throughout the world by providing biblically based counseling, teaching materials and a public speaking ministry with the goal of leading Christians to victory over sexual sin and a deeper life in God. Well thanks, guys! I appreciate your concern. What is "sexual sin", I wonder? The site doesn't appear to offer a laundry list, nor does it offer one of those fun "sin tests", so there's points off for them there. Near as I can tell, then, they're against: Masturbation Promiscuity Adultery Homosexuality Pornography Sex for pleasure Oral and anal sex (and, really, anything beyond missionary sex) They are for: Godly living Sobriety Sex between married people for the purposes of procreation Bo-ring! Pure Life Ministries offers a number of services to help men (and women!) mired in sin, though. They've got a Live-in program ($150/week, plus a $1500 "induction fee" - the first $600 are due the day you arrive) for men that need to escape the plethora of worldly sins surrounding them. What better place than a 45-acre campus in Kentucky, "away from the hustle and bustle of city life"? They've got At-home counseling ($1000 for singles, $2000 for couples, but they'll knock a couple hundred off if you pay in advance) for those that can't take a trip to Kentucky. Let's not forget this threat: They're in your church, singing in the choir, serving in leadership and listening to your sermons: men enslaved to pornography. It's time to deal with the toughest battle men face: living in sexual purity. End the silence; go on the offensive and rescue your men! That's right, Pure Life Ministries will help you host a Men of Purity Weekend!!! No details of the cost, but it appears a proper MOPW requires the presence of Steve Gallagher, so I'm sure there are attendant airfare, luxury hotel and Perhaps the biggest disappointment of the site is the complete lack of a handy list of links to sites purveying sexual sin, as I'm getting tired of the same old porn, and was hoping PLM could give me some new tips. For those looking for simple humor, though, Steve and Kathy Gallagher do answer your questions about sexual sin! w00t! Here's a good one: Q. I have heard it said by well known Christian authors/therapists that masturbation is acceptable for a married man in times of separation as long as the mind was kept in the marriage covenant. Is this wrong? This seems a reasonable question, with a simple answer. Let's see what Steve and Kathy say! God created sex as a means for a married couple to physically express their love to one other. It is a very special act that provides the closest intimacy two people can possibly enjoy together. As has already been stated, marital sex affords the opportunity to a husband and wife to unselfishly provide pleasure for each other. And, of course, it also provides the means for a couple to have children. Underlying all of this is a lifelong commitment and a deep devotion that two people share together. This is God’s idea of sexuality. Blah, blah, blah. They don't like to give short answers. Short answer, BEATING YOUR MEAT IS WRONG, WRONG, WRONG. It's selfish! It's mental adultery! I'm surprised they didn't trot out the old "hairy-palmed, drooling blind imbecile" crap. We'll skip for now the bigoted, homophobic crap these morons spew. Suffice it to say that if these guys had their way, all the fun stuff wouldn't be allowed. Feh. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 8:07:00 AM | Some Good News Cap'n Slappy has declared that, as TLAPD falls on a Sunday this year, we'll be celebratin' Talk Like A Pirate Day ALL WEEKEND!!! ARRRR! In honor of this bonanza o' good news, I took a quiz: 
You're Captain Jack Sparrow: smart, savvy, a demon with the eyeliner and the best damn pirate we've ever seen. And only a litte crazy. Savvy? Which POTC character are you?
posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 6:38:00 AM | More On The Liar In Chief From The Nation: Why Bush Left Texas. Growing evidence suggests that George W. Bush abruptly left his Texas Air National Guard unit in 1972 for substantive reasons pertaining to his inability to continue piloting a fighter jet. And there's more, of course. Here's hoping more mud sticks. How d'ya like them apples, Mr. Rove? posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 4:00:00 AM | Tuesday, September 14, 2004
Laura Bush - Librarian, Stem Cell Expert and Forensic Analyst Buried in an article in the Washington Post (deliveries/dawg), Laura Bush weighs in on the documents allegedly by her hubby's former commander in the Texas ANG's "Champagne Squadron". Meanwhile, Laura Bush became the first person from the White House to say the documents are likely forgeries. "You know they are probably altered," she told Radio Iowa in Des Moines yesterday. "And they probably are forgeries, and I think that's terrible, really." I'm not a forensic expert, either, but so far, every argument I've seen against the authenticity of the documents has been shot down. Unlike the Swift Boat Liars, we've got a plethora of evidence that Bush failed to keep his commitment to defend Texas' airspace against the Viet Cong. While I'm of the opinion that in the normal course of events, most stuff that happened 30 years ago doesn't apply, but two things make it different: (1) The motherfuckin' right asked for it - first against Bill Clinton, then Gore and now Kerry - so I see this as justified payback. (2) Bush claims to be a good leader and a man that keeps his commitments, but I'm seeing nothing different in his behavior now than his behavior then. Lies, lies, and more lies. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 2:03:00 PM | Monday, September 13, 2004
What Did They Know, And When Did They Know It? Abu Ghraib. More than anything else, and there's a lot (the invasion of Iraq, the no-bid contracts to Halliburton, cluster bombs, Fallujah, the Justice Department's locking away of Muslim men without charge or trial, among others), the abuse of innocent detainees at Saddam Hussein's notorious Abu Ghraib prison by American soldiers and the subsequent release of photos of naked prisoners and leering guards has done irreparable damage to America's credibility on the Arab Street. Our president would have you believe that the abuses occurred without the knowledge or official sanction of commanding officers, that "a few bad apples" are responsible for the totality of the abuse. Seymour Hersh has been investigating this case, and has come to rather different conclusions. Hersh provides details of how President George Bush signed off on the establishment of a secret unit that was given advance approval to kill or capture and interrogate "high-value" suspects - considered by many to be in defiance of international law - an officially "unacknowledged" programme that was eventually transferred wholesale from Guantánamo to the Abu Ghraib prison in Iraq. So Bush knew in advance - hell, planned - for the illegal detention and interrogation of suspected enemy combatants without charge or trial. A CIA analyst visited Guantánamo in summer 2002 and returned "convinced that we were committing war crimes" and that "more than half the people there didn't belong there. He found people lying in their own faeces," a CIA source told Hersh. The misAdministration knew of abuses two years ago and did nothing, retreating into stonewalling, lying and hoping it would blow over. I'm reminded of a quote a former VP at my employer used to throw out when someone told him, "We hope such and such will happen." Hope Is Not A Method In an interview with the Guardian, Hersh provided evidence that the administration sought to evade the issue: he said codenames of some programmes were changed within hours of his original story appearing, presumably to maintain their secrecy. This, despite overwhelming evidence that the abuses at Abu Ghraib, and other detention facilities around the world, were authorized from the top. And what else does the mAdministration have to say about this? Mr Rumsfeld told reporters on Friday he had approved the use of harsh interrogation measures, but that they had only been meant for Guantánamo. He said the measures ought to be contrasted with those of terrorists. "Does it rank up there with chopping someone's head off on television?" he asked. "It doesn't." So as long as the terrorists are cutting off folks' heads, it's OK to torture prisoners. It's OK to rape prisoners. It's OK to beat them to death. It's OK to round up innocent bystanders and subject them to dehumanizing treatment. It's all OK, because we're the cowboys in the White Hats. I wonder, though, if the rest of the world sees it that way. I suspect they don't. So fuck you very much, Mr. President, for making my world and the world my family and friends inhabit that much less safe. Thank you for giving the jihadis and psychotic fundamentalists more ammunition and more recruiting tools. Thank you for making sure we won't be trusted by the rest of the world for a long, long time to come. 
I'm sure this man and his family thank you, as well. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 1:25:00 PM | Curious. Mystery beast washes up on shore in Whitehaven, UK. 
PARTON residents are baffled by what has been described as a “mini Loch Ness Monster” washed up on their beach. So it could be a hoax, or an unidentified beastie. Looking at the photo and the beer can next to it, it looks to be just a hair under 4' long. For those desiring a geographical reference, Whitehaven is on the west coast of Britain, just south of Scotland. 
posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 9:21:00 AM | Sunday, September 12, 2004
Update on North Korea U.S. Says N.Korea Blast Probably Not Nuclear Other possibilities include a failed missile engine test or a high-explosives test as a precursor to a nuclear blast, diplomats said. I dunno. The North Koreans scare me, because they, more than any other nation, look and act like those crazy motherfuckers that sit at the end of the bar and mutter to themselves, slamming down beer after beer until they just snap and knife some innocent bystander in the eyeball, launch themselves at the bartender and bite his ear off. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 9:43:00 PM | Sunday Morning Miscellany The Honored Dead. From the New York Times: Roster of the Dead. Requires registration or a short hop to bugmenot.com It's something I'm willing to bet the Fuckin' Simp Chimp and Captain Crashcart haven't looked at, and won't, unless someone grabs them by the scruff of their necks and slams their faces against the wall to improve clarity of vision. Well, you can just rock me to sleep. The South Korean government is playing down suggestions that a massive explosion last week in North Korea was caused by a nuclear device. Yep, Iraq's empty semi trailers are proof of WMD activity, but a mushroom-cloud over North Korea is nothing to worry about. Mission Accomplished! Things looking up? Not hardly. Health insurance costs for employees have risen 59% since 2000. Wages have increased, on average, 12%. The rise in costs is being driven largely by bigger insurance claims that stem from higher prices for hospital services and prescription drugs, as well as growing demand for healthcare as the population ages, Kaiser found. Employers and others also have blamed profiteering by big insurers and hospital chains.The rise in costs is being driven largely by bigger insurance claims that stem from higher prices for hospital services and prescription drugs, as well as growing demand for healthcare as the population ages, Kaiser found. Employers and others also have blamed profiteering by big insurers and hospital chains.Funny, I don't see any mention of trial lawyers in there, just the usual greed at corporate hospitals, drug companies and insurance companies. Late edit: Maggie Osterberg gave me permission to post a wicked funny piece of photoshop magic. Thanks, Maggie! You guys don't forget to check her blog out daily. It's Maggieriffic! 
Image © Copyright 2004 Maggie Osterberg posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 7:11:00 AM | Saturday, September 11, 2004
Just Got Back From The Drafthouse Melissa and I went to see "Hero" this afternoon. It's a fantastic movie, powerful and moving, with absolutely beautiful cinematography and fight choreograpy. Marvin's review pretty much sums up how I feel. possible spoilers, click at your own risk Go see it. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 7:45:00 PM | Yeah, Riiiiiiiiiight. The economy's doing GREAT if you ask Dick Cheney. For those of us not getting "Four hundred thousand people make some money trading on eBay.". John Edwards let Captain Crashcart know he wasn't fooled, though: "If we only included bake sales and how much money kids make at lemonade stands, this economy would really be cooking," Edwards said in a statement. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 1:18:00 PM | Friday, September 10, 2004
Friday Five Through The Ages Gord wants to know: You're given a chance to use a time machine to snatch five historical personages and bring them to the twenty-first century. Perhaps you're saving them from their awful fates in history, or perhaps just picking them up for teatime and a Saturday night dinner party. The catch is, there's a problem with the time machine and a possibility that you will need to house all of them in your living space for a few days, pehaps up to a week. So they'd better get along. Which five historical personages would you pick up, with good faith that they would play well with the others, and what would you expect each to contribute to the evening of merriment? Interesting historical figure, plays well with others, decent company - this is gonna be a stumper. First off, I'm going to assume that there's a working bathroom in the house, as well as a working laundry room. Otherwise, I'd have to limit the experience to folks from non-stinky cultures. Second, I'll engage in some arm-waving and say that the Alien Fruitbats that gave me the time machine also gave me translation widgets, so everyone can understand everyone else. Third, the Alien Fruitbats have also installed safeguards to ensure that anyone I bring uptime can't cosh me in the head, steal the time machine and take over the world or any such nonsense. (1) Lorenzo de' Medici - Not the one Machiavelli dedicated The Prince to, I'm talking about the Lorenzo that was a patron of DaVinci and Michelangelo, among others. The Lorenzo that was a poet, statesman, rebel against the Pope and practical joker. He made Florence a citadel of arts and letters, the fiery center of the Italian Renaissance. (2) Homer - The blind poet, the man that is credited with The Iliad and The Odyssey. I want to hear what else' he's got in there, and I want to have recorders running to catch it. (3) Jack "King" Kirby - The man that ushered in the Silver Age of Comics. One of the most prolific and influential artists of the 20th Century. Say what you want about his dialogue, the man had a gift. He was instrumental in the genesis of Captain America, the Fantastic Four, Thor, the Hulk, Iron Man, the Silver Surfer, Mister Miracle, the New Gods and dozens more superhero comics. His dynamic style moved comic books out of their Funny Pages genesis and into a category of art all their own. I want to hang out with Mr. Kirby for a week and listen to his stories about World War II, and I want to commission a comic from him. Kirby was my kind of guy. Plus, he hated Nixon. (4) Winston Churchill - The Right Honourable Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill, KG, OM, CH, FRS. Along with FDR one of the most influential political figures of the 20th Century. He was a cranky, curmudgeonly fellow, but supposed to be an excellent member of a dinner party. I'd love to hear him dissect what went wrong at Gallipoli over a cigar and some brandy. (5) Hughes de Payens - The first Grand Master of the Knights Templar. I want a week to interrogate him, get all the poop on the origin of his order. I'm just curious, and fascinated by the dark, conspiratorial legends that have sprung up around the order. The other Fivers are, as always, located on the left hand side of The Blog. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 7:36:00 AM | What The Fuck Is It With The Right Wing? While Bush was blathering about Kerry's "hidden tax plan" (and not mentioning his record of fucking over everyone except the richest 2% of Americans), I noticed this little tidbit from the article: Bush's earlier remarks in Colmar were disrupted repeatedly by the shouts of protesters, and four were forcibly removed, one pulled out by her hair. Then, I found this photo: 
The old fart yanking on that young woman's hair looks like he's actually getting off on it. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 6:27:00 AM | Thursday, September 09, 2004
I Ain't Sayin' Nothin', But You Know What I'm Sayin' Ganked from Talking Points Memo, via Comments From Left Field AP: 'U.S. death toll in Iraq passes 1,000 mark' ... 4:27 PM, Sept. 7th, 2004 AP: 'Ridge: Terrorists hope to disrupt election' ... 4:40 PM, Sept. 7th, 2004 Hmmmmm..... posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 9:36:00 AM | Fighting The Power, Small-Scale I’ve tended of late to focus on the big picture – national and international news and politics, venting my spleen at the bigwigs that I see as part of the problem. With my eyes aimed at the citadels of power, I don’t always notice the Man On The Street. As I drive home every day, I’ve noticed a man pacing the side of FM 620 in North Austin, holding a sign that says “Unfair” in front of Sonterra Apartments. Yesterday, I finally stopped to talk to him. His name is H. Mushinsky, and he tells an interesting story. I’ll let the words on the flyer he’s handing out tell it.
There was a second page attached, apparently concerning reactions to his picket.
I’m going to try to get in touch with the apartment management and see if I can get a statement from them – this is an interesting story. No matter what the outcome, it’s a fantastic drama on a small stage. Mr. Mushinsky, I salute you. You’re taking a stand, and you’re unafraid to let the world know about it. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 8:10:00 AM | Wednesday, September 08, 2004
Frickin' Blogspot! The previous post was written just before 9AM today, and didn't get published until 2:00. No explanation is forthcoming, yet. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 2:07:00 PM | GMail, Anyone? I've got 6 invites I'll give away. I mean, you could offer me gobs of money and I wouldn't turn it down, but since I'm offering the invites for free, it'd be kind of stupid for you to do that, right? Email me for an invite, first come, first serve. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 8:50:00 AM | Tuesday, September 07, 2004
Clever, clever, clever Some wags have created a damn nice website - Atlantic Tunnel. It's done well enough that I did a double-take. Almost makes we want to enter the contest they're having. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 2:43:00 PM | Diebold's BUSTED Not, of course, that I expect the So-Called Liberal Media to notice. Black Box Voting has found something interesting in Diebold's vote-counting software: Manipulation technique found in the Diebold central tabulator -- 1,000 of these systems are in place, and they count up to two million votes at a time. There's more there, and I guarantee you'll be feeling as queasy as I am when you finish. I'm inclined at this point to question the slightest variance between Diebold-certified election results and exit polls at this point. Thanks to Omnium for the scoop on this. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 10:43:00 AM | Fuckin' Cowardly Thugs This is making the rounds in the Blogosphere, and I'm just piling on. First, watch this video of the protestors that spoke up during Bush's speech at the RNC. (I had some problems getting the video to play on Mozilla Firefox, so if you use a decent browser, you might instead switch over to Internet Exploder just this once) I'll wait here for you to finish watching it. Dum-de-dum-dum-dum. All done? Good. Did you see it? Yes, that is a young Republican kicking a protester that's being restrained by 3 Secret Service agents. That takes guts, I tell you - why, she could've bled all over his Dockers! If you see this person, please resist the temptation to have some of your buddies hold him down while you kick him. That would be wrong, because he could possibly identify you. Hit him from behind, I say. Jesus' General thinks he might be Dr. Laura's son, but the jury's still out. The protestor, by the way, was arrested. The smug little brownshirt? No charges. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 8:05:00 AM | Monday, September 06, 2004
Back At Work Happy Labor Day! In the office for some holiday overtime, still dealing with the aftermath of Frances in Florida. For your Labor Day amusement, I've got a link to Democratic Underground's Top Ten Conservative Idiots. Here's a couple of highlights: George W. Bush has not treated veterans well since he came to power (cutting combat pay, cutting veterans benefits, um, getting an awful lot of them killed for nothing), but that certainly wasn't enough to pry the Republican party's nose from the military's ass last week. Fortunately some bold delegates decided to show the GOP's true colors and went to great lengths to ridicule America's veterans. Arizona Rep. John Shadegg (R) joined the hate-fest on Wednesday, saying that Kerry voters "have mental health problems" at a speech to GOP delegates. If Zell Miller is anything to go by, I'd say Mr. Shadegg needs to take a quick look in the mirror. Hope you guys have a happy day celebrating the American Worker. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 8:52:00 AM | Sunday, September 05, 2004
Mission Accomplished! Or not. From the New York Times (for login/password, go to bugmenot) comes a nice little piece that discusses how well the At a recent meeting with a group of tribal sheiks, an American general spoke with evident frustration about the latest Iraqi city to fall into the hands of insurgents. Remember Fallujah? Remember how we've played slap and tickle with the citizens since the invasion? The hardcore nutjobs fuckin' own that town. According to Bush, though, that's a success story, because we turned it over to the Iraqi National Guard, who have all very prudently taken off their uniforms and joined up with the nutjobs, fled or been killed. Sadr City in the heart of Baghdad? Same thing - the only difference being that it's Shiites instead of Sunnis that hate us. Najaf, which was supposed to be a major vicotry, ended with Sadr's militia just taking their weapons home, not turning them in to the Iraqi governing council. All that's come out of this war is a new buzzword for Al Quaeda to recruit with, over 1000 dead Americans and allies, and tens of thousands of dead civilians. And Bush wants to claim this is a positive? posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 9:48:00 PM | A Friendly Reminder, Ye Scurvy Knaves! Sunday, September 19th is International Talk Like A Pirate Day, me favorite holiday o' the year. I'll be expectin' all ye sea-dogs to participate. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 7:16:00 AM | Saturday, September 04, 2004
Here I Sit In the office, monitoring alarms as Florida braces for Hurricane Frances (and I'd like to point out that so far this year, we've had a Hurricane Alexander and a Hurricane Frances, with a Hurricane Matthew on the way. Funny thing is, in our household, we've got an Alexander (Alec), a Francesca (Franny) and a Matthew (Drew's middle name), which leads me to think the National Weather Service has it in for my family), and I'm very, very bored. Just enough happening to prevent me from doing other work that needs doing, and I've had to stop 7-8 times while writing this to check on an alarm. Granted, once the hurricane makes landfall, things will likely get very interesting very fast. Interesting being defined here as "bad things happening to other people". posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 4:29:00 PM | More on the Boo Story Talking Points Memo debunks the reports of boos when Bush wished Clinton well. The AP has now apparently retracted the part of this article about booing. So presumably the reporter didn't hear what she thought she heard. A number of readers tell me they saw video of the event and heard no booing. So a mea culpa on my part, and I'll retract the comments from yesterday's post. But that's as far as I'll go - the GOP still has a lot to answer for. Props to Tim Hall for the follow-up on this. Go check out his blog, especially if you're into gaming or trains. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 1:39:00 PM | Friday, September 03, 2004
Rethuglicans - What A Bunch Of Charmers! Compassionate Conservatism in action WEST ALLIS, Wis. (AP) President Bush on Friday wished Bill Clinton ''best wishes for a swift and speedy recovery.'' ''He's is in our thoughts and prayers,'' Bush said at a campaign rally. Bush's audience of thousands in West Allis, Wis., booed. Bush did nothing to stop them. Bush offered his wishes while campaigning one day after accepting the presidential nomination at the Republican National Convention in New York. Clinton was hospitalized in New York after complaining of mild chest pain and shortness of breath. Bush recently praised Clinton when the former president went to the White House for the unveiling of his official portrait. He lauded Clinton for his knowledge, compassion and ''the forward-looking spirit that Americans like in a president.'' posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 1:06:00 PM | Friday Five, The Sleeping Beauty Version Laura, The Finnish Fury, asks us: I was watching Disney's Sleeping Beauty the other night, while leafing through an old storybook for the original story, and I found myself snorting at the gifts the precious little princess got - gifts of beauty and song, virtue and kindness - So very useful. What five gifts would you give the fateful little princess? Beauty? Song? Virtue? Kindness? Bah! waves hand dismissively Bah, I say! That little girl deserved better than that. (1) Inner Strentgh - The wisdom and intestinal fortitude to decide for herself what she does. Fer chrissakes, everyone knew the conditions of her curse - age 16, prick her finger on a spindle, falls asleep (as would everyone else in the castle), rescuded an indeterminate number of years later by a trespasser with a penchant for necrophilia and jailbait. Hell, just give the girl the guts to not play with the things the curse names. (2) Brains and an Innovating Spirit - Spindles, and by extension the low-tech textile industry, are a no-go. With a good head on her shoulders, the princess could have fostered an industrial revolution, moving the kingdom past the cottage spinning economy, sequestering those dangerous spindles deep in the heart of mills and hydraulic machinery. Since royalty tends to stay the fuck away from people doing actual work, that's added insurance the princess could have used. As an added by-product, the peasants could have pulled themselves up into the middle class, and the kingdom would've been stronger, eventually moving into a Constitutional Monarchy, allowing them to focus on building a more equitable society instead of continuing to support an outmoded, archaic, autocratic system. (3) Thick Callouses - Think about it: If her fingers are too tough for a spindle to penetrate, bitch can't get pricked, can she? (4) Better Parents - This one would have been retroactive. See, the little darling got cursed because her parents were snobbish and rude, and made a point of not inviting the "Evil" fairy. A little dose of manners given to them before they sent out invitations and the "Evil" fairy (probably just a fairy with, you know, a no-nonsense attitude and an egalitarian spirit) would've been happy to give the princess a better gift. Granted, there's always the chance that the Fairy was just a total bitch, but even total bitches are a lot less vindictive if they don't have a legitimate grudge. (5) Good Lawyers - Sleeping Beauty has a whole raft of cases - against her parents for willingly exposing her to danger, against the Evil Fairy for the curse, against her Fairy Godmothers for not doing more to protect her, against the spindle manufaturer for making a defective product (this one, I suspect, would get settled out of court) and against Prince Charming for (a) breaking and entering, (b) theft by taking, (c) trespassing, (d) forced sexual assault against a minor and finally (e) transporting a minor across jurisdictional lines with the intent of comitting a felony. Way I see it, Sleeping Beauty could have at the very least wound up with a good chunk of Europe in her hands, no dead-weight prince weighing her down and a restraining order preventing those goddamn Fairy Godmothers from fucking up the lives of any more young girls. If you want to read more from other Friday Fivers, look to the left. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 7:46:00 AM | Thursday, September 02, 2004
ARRR! It's Drivin' Me Nuts! Couldn't resist one of my favorite punchlines... But seriously, after Zell Miller's "Tribute To The Dixiecrats" at the Rethuglican National Convention last night, I've been trying to figure out who he reminded me of. Thanks to Buzzflash, I remember now. Kinda creepy, ain't it? posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 8:45:00 PM | Corporate Asshattery, Minor When I take over, it'll be a misdemeanor, punishable by a week in The Stocks. Yesterday, my employer rolled out a new intraweb site. All over the building are signs welcoming us to "The Spot"* On those signs are also a schedule for training classes. Training classes, for a frickin' web site. Call me crazy, but if you're working at a telecommunications company in the 21st Century, a company that prides itself on being at the cutting edge of communications innovation, and you can't understand how to navigate a GODDAMN WEB SITE, perhaps "training" is not so much in order as a reassessment of your career path. Wal-Mart greeter might be more in line with your technological savvy, I would think. * - Name changed for the hell of it posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 9:57:00 AM | Long Weekend? Might be. Seems my team at work might have to come in and provide backup in the Network Surveillance Center for Hurricane Frances this weekend. There are 4 of us, so with any luck, we'll be able to spread the misery out a little. Our "backup" duties will include staring at alarm screens and occasionally saying, "Yep! Site's still got power!" or, "Nope! Power's out! Better get someone out there once it's safe to drive again!" On the plus side, we'll make some fat OT out of this, which is always welcome. On the negative side, it means more time for Melissa wrangling the posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 8:51:00 AM | Wednesday, September 01, 2004
More Random Stuff (1) Alan Keyes takes a potshot at Dick Cheney's family: Keyes' first comments about Mary Cheney came during an interview Monday night on Sirius OutQ, a New York-based satellite station that provides 24-hour gay and lesbian programming. Way to go, Mr. Keyes! You've so far alienated almost everyone you've come into contact with - that's quite an achievement! (2) The Ludic Log on the current Hobson's Choice facing the voters: You're choosing between someone who will at least attempt to address the needs of the poorest in society, and someone who has sold an economic program that is fraudulent from top to bottom, based on cooked numbers and outright lies, which blatantly enriches the wealthiest of the wealthy while pretending to help the poorest of the poor. (3) Ken Lay is a big, fat, whiny titty-baby (Washington Post, try bugmenot.com for a login): At my request, my lawyers have filed motions in federal court asking for an immediate and speedy trial on the charges I face. To facilitate this, I offered to forgo discovery and to waive a jury trial, leaving it to a judge to determine my guilt or innocence. Cry me a river, Mr. Lay. At worst, you'll get 5 years in Club Fed instead of the Pound-You-In-The-Ass time you deserve. You'll walk away from this with a few million, while the investors and employees you robbed have to try to pick up the pieces and survive. Whatever punishment you get from this, it's not enough. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 1:27:00 PM | Morning Miscellany Took Alec to Wal-Mart to get new tires for the car, and found out during my 2-hour wait that the tires we'd had put on the car at that same Wal-Mart a couple of years earlier were, in fact, the wrong speed rating. Which has led to a slight alignment problem. Needless to say, their new policy of only installing properly-rated tires is not retroactive, which means I'm out the money for the alignment problem when I can get around to fixing that. Bastiches. Still, Alec and I had fun wandering through the store looking at the crappy stuff on the shelves. Our dinner wasn't so hot, but what do you expect at Wal-Mart, right? Heard part of the Tequila Twins' speech at the Rethug's convention on the way home, and was, shall we say, underwhelmed with their performance. Der Gropenfuhrer's speech was described as a "Horatio Alger" story by some, but I don't recall Horatio Alger ever posing for gay skin pics. I'd respect Ah-nuldt more if he wouldn't drink the Rethuglican Kool-Aid, as John McCain apparently did as well. I'm reading _Eats Shoots and Leaves_ right now, and it's a book that I, as a punctuation stickler, was born to adore. Oooh! Almost forgot! The lovely and talented Adrienne Martini is going to get a book published! In 2006, I'm expecting alla you to buy at least one copy, maybe more. So Adrienne, that should boost your sales figures by 3 or 4 books. posted by Adam C. Lipscomb at 8:08:00 AM | |
