Things That Make Me Want To Bite People In The Face

Sometimes, I read things and I think, "Why can't I have a 'SMITE' button on my computer?"

Here's a few that I've seen this week.

1. Rush Limbaugh:
   
   
   Yes, he really said that stupid-ass shit. I'd love to see him get stuck in an elevator with the feminists I know. That stompdown would be worth putting on Pay-Per-View.
2. The GOP in general.

   The Republican party struggles to find women candidates and the Republican National Committee’s special person in charge of lady-finding may be part of the problem. Jan Larimer is an RNC co-chair and he/she, you can tell, really understands women and how to win them over: “Women sometimes need a little more handholding, or they need their friends to help them make a decision. And by our going in and talking to them and recruiting and educating and training them to either get involved in a campaign or become a candidate, we’re giving them the tools so that they can do that on their own.”

   Seriously, WTF? Stupid-ass cracker fuckheads.
3. Michael Fucking Steele. "Trust me, after taxes, a million dollars is not a lot of money." Fuck you, Steele, you ignorant, lickspittle festering sack of shit. Live on what I make, you'll change your goddamn tune.
4. Jim Carrey and Jenny McCarthy, who somehow think that it's OK to violate every fucking legal and ethical code imaginable when making shit up "researching" a theory, because everyone knows vaccines are EVIL, even if every single piece of scientific evidence says they're safe. Yeah, when I want advice on medicine and science, I'm going to turn to Ace Ventura and some dumbass bimbo best known for showing her cooter. Bitch, your crotchfruit's autism has fuck-all to do with a vaccine. Go suck on the tailpipe of a Trabant, McCarthy.
5. The entire nation of Turkey. Fuck, if this is the Shining Light of secularism in the Islamic world, go to fucking hell all of you. Don't read the article unless you want to be sick, suffice it to say that any nation in which "honor" killings account for half of all murders needs a serious fucking adjustment. We won't even touch on their continued denial of genocide. Fuck you, Turkey, and I hope the dick rots off every single man in your nation.

DAMN YOU! YOU'VE KILLED US ALL, YOU FOOLS!

Seriously, don't these scientists ever watch movies?

Robots evolve to learn cooperation, hunting.

I mean, even my 6-year-old can see where this is going to wind up - packs of feral robots hunting humans for sport. Between this and the robots they're working on that can use decomposing organic materials to generate power, we're in trouble.

If those robots ever team up with the killer bees or the spiders, we're totally fucked.

Fucking Mouthbreathing Asswipes

Daily Kos conducted a poll of self-identified Republicans. The results are, at best, disturbing.

A few examples of the flat-out, toilet-sucking stupid and scary fuckhead crazy shit:

Should Barack Obama be impeached, or not?

Yes 39
No 32
Not Sure 29

Do you think Barack Obama is a socialist?

Yes 63
No 21
Not Sure 16

Do you believe Sarah Palin is more qualified to be President than Barack Obama?

Yes 53
No 14
Not Sure 33

So let's make sure we've got this straight -
(1) Get a hummer in the Oval Office, IMPEACH.
(2) Steal an election, lie your ass off to start a war, spy on the American people, in general wipe your ass with the Constitution, DO NOT IMPEACH.
(3) Be... what? Black? Oh, hell yeah - IMPEACH.

And 63% think Obama's a socialist? Those fucking asswipes don't even know what socialism is, if they think a cautious, centrist intellectual like Obama is a socialist. Put me in charge, I'll show you some motherfucking socialism, assholes.

And then the one that made me want to throw flaming bricks at people. 53% of these fuckwits thought a half-term governor - who can't even manage to form a coherent sentence, whose stock answer to any question about what she reads is "All of 'em!", a crazed whackjob and religious whackaloon whose nipples get hard at the thought of the Rapture, they think that is more qualified than the man in the White House right now? And there's another 33% that just can't tell - What the fucking fuck fuckitty fuck is that about?

Fuck me if I can figure Republicans out. They must've purged the party of anyone with more than a third grade education, then given the ones that were left a goddamn lobotomy with a rusty coathanger. They have no ideas beyond taking a huge shit in the punchbowl of American life. It's not just that they don't understand how our government works, or the problems facing us, or the state of the fucking world - THEY KNOW THEY DON'T KNOW, AND THEY DON'T CARE. They revel in their ignorance, flaunting it like those red-assed baboons that jack off against the glass at the zoo when they're not flinging fistfuls of shit at each other.

The Democrats need to stop trying to build bridges with the other side. The GOP has sunk so deep in the mire of anti-intellectualism that calling them "Know-Nothings" would be a compliment. Shut out the GOP, and if they want to filibuster, fuck, let 'em. But make them stand up there and do it, not just threaten. I mean, shit, when my son threatened to hold his breath until his face turned blue if I didn't buy him ice cream, I didn't cave in to his demands. Fuck no! I looked him in the eye and said, "OK, then. If you feel that strongly about it, do it, and we'll see what it gets you." Thirty seconds later, he shut up and quit whining about ice cream.

Right now, we've got a choice between a party of shit-addled fuckheaded morons and a party of spineless weenies. That's not really much of a choice at all.

Comment-related commentary

Just a heads up, Haloscan, which I've been using for comments since I started this blog, will be shutting down next month. I'm switching to Blogger's in-house comment system, so don't freak out when your recent comments disappear.

Carry on.

What I'm Listening To

Some of you (Hi, Mom!) wonder what it is I do all day. Well, I look for work, try to keep the house straight (failing at this, but improving incrementally), wrangle the kids, run errands and, while I'm doing the above, I listen to podcasts, because they're free, and I can download them on iTunes.

Here are the podcasts that I'm seriously grooving on right now:

(1) The History of Rome - Mike Duncan started with Aeneas' arrival in Italy and is currently on episode 81, covering the Emperor Hadrian. His 'casts are concise and information-packed, and I recommend them to anyone interested in Roman history.

(2) Lars Brownworth - He's best known for his 12 Byzantine Rulers podcast series, but he's also currently doing Norman Centuries, a history of the Normans and their impact on Europe. Fascinating stuff, all of it - and a lot more info than you get in your average history class.

(3) The History Network puts out a couple of podcasts on military history, also worth a listen. The subjects vary a lot more than the podcasts above, but that makes for a nice bit of variation - some modern, some ancient, some in-between.

(4) Historyzine - A nice little podcast, more of a podzine, with occasional bits from other contributors, I'm currently learning much, much more about the War of the Spanish Succession than the 2 paragraphs it got in European History in college.

(5) Binge Thinking History Podcast - Another good one, Tony Cocks covered the Battle of Britain in great detail, and is working through a history of the British Navy now. I'm finally understanding some of the terminology and practices described in the Master and Commander novels.

(6) Skeptoid - a favorite for me and the kids, Brian Dunning gives brief, straightforward 'casts about a variety of topics, stressing how critical thinking and research can help sort out truth from fiction in everything from "Organic food" to myths of Tesla-inspired superweapon tests over Canada.

(7) The Skeptic's Guide to the Universe - Put out by the New England Skeptical Society, it's a weekly podcast with news discussions, lively banter and fascinating interviews with all manner of guests from the Skeptical and scientific communities.

(8) Chariots of Iron - An Atheist/Skeptic/Humanist podcast, it is clever, irreverent and profane. Not for the kids, and not for the easily offended.

Having a podcast going while I fold laundry, cook dinner or even shop at the grocery is better than music for me - it keeps my brain active while I do mostly mechanical stuff. I'm always in the market for good podcast recommendations - I'd love to find a good Etymology/Philology 'Cast, and anything covering the Hellenistic Era and/or the Persian Wars would be especially cool.

Anyhoo, I'll return you to your regularly scheduled bilious rants soon. Cheers!

The Supremes

So, at first, I was pissed off - Bush's appointees to the Supreme Court threw a huge monkey wrench in the middle of the campaign finance reform machinery - but as I thought about it for more, it occurred to me - What, exactly, will be different? I mean, the corporations already own Congress lock, stock and barrel. They've derailed healthcare reform and shut down oversight of the banks that wrecked our economy in the first place, there's no will in Congress or the White House to do anything about the steady bleed of American jobs to India and China, so what, exactly, is going to change?

Until we, the American people, stand up and tell those corrupt, shitbag fatcat goat-rapers to go to hell (and, probably, metaphorically string a few up on the lampposts of Wall Street), elect more real progressives to all levels of government and find some way of making the corporate media toe the line, we're fucked. This ruling by the Supreme Court doesn't change anything except the fact that we'll have a better idea who's fucking us without lube.

Fuck you, John Travolta

Aaaand now the $camitologists' turn.

Fuck you, you miserable, toilet-sucking shitbag vultures. Seriously, you people make me sick. You know what Haiti needs? Food. Medicine. Construction equipment. Clean water. RELIEF FROM 200 YEARS OF CRUSHING DEBT AND COLONIALISM.. Know what they don't need? Scientology. Shit, I don't know anyone that needs it, though I can think of a few that deserve it.

Here's hoping that everyone that approved Travolta's lame-brained publicity stunt suffers from dysentery plus cholera, malaria and typhus as well. Throw in as many vitamin deficiency diseases as possible and I might start thinking there's some justice in this world. Because, seriously, my son donated his lunch money to Haiti yesterday, and that $5 is going to do ten - no, a thousand - times as much to help Haiti as fucking e-meters and "volunteer ministers" counseling people about the evils of psychiatry.

Scientology isn't a religion, it's a scam. It's bullshit wrapped in copyright infringement lawsuits, drizzled with the evil, money-grubbing tenderness of a loan shark and topped with the willful lack of concern for the public weal of a serial killing sociopath. Fuck you, Scientologists.

And that goes for anyone sending bibles, korans, rosaries, prayer mats, homeopathic "medicine", economic "advice", vegan food or anything other than real food, real medicine, clothing and shelter materials.

GNAAAAAAAAH. I want to smash things, I'm so pissed off.

PS: A quick series of fuckyous to Martha Coakley for a craptacular campaign, Scott Brown for encouraging some nasty, misogynistic shit from his supporters, the national Democratic Party for failing to give the necessary support when it was needed and last, but not least, the voters of Massachusetts for taking a big dump on Ted Kennedy's grave.

Haiti

I know there's only, like, 6 people reading me after my time in the wilderness, but I wanted to post this:

If you're an atheist/non-deist/agnostic/apatheist, consider donating to recovery efforts via richarddawkins.net. The money will go only to aid groups without religious affiliation, and as many others in the atheist/skeptic/humanist community have noted, every cent donated puts the lie to the claim that only the religious care about their fellow human beings.

If you're religious, you can donate there, too.

More ranty screeds coming soon.

Dear Rush Limbaugh:

You, sir, are a tumor upon the face of the world. I can see you're all for the US Military killing Black and Brown people, but the thought of the military helping them, by delivering food, by rebuilding shattered infrastructure, by digging out survivors before they die cold, lonely deaths trapped under tons of rubble - that must really drive your pea-sized brain around the bend.

If I believed in God, I'd pray like hell for you to live a long life. I'd like to see you forgotten in your own lifetime, your wealth dissipated, abandoned by friends and family. I want you to feel keenly the wrongs you inflicted and wished upon others, I want your conscience to wrack you constantly, filling your thoughts with knowledge of your despicable lies and twisted ideology. I want you to be struck mute, unable to spew your filth, but able to see, able to read, able to hear how every facet of your beliefs are rejected by our society. I wish for you to die at last, alone and unloved, reaching out for redemption and realizing as your light dies out that you only had one chance in your life, and that you wasted that chance.

No Love,

Adam

Dear David Brooks:

You're a fucking capitalist vulture, using a massive tragedy to push your agenda of economic colonialism and World Bank/IMF failed ideology. Please to ingest a gallon of flesh-eating bacteria ASAP.

Thank you.